When we’re slipping down anxiety’s slopes, it’s usually not pretty.
We rant. We rave. We make blanket statements on the condition of our lives.
When under pressure, inaccurate self-judgments are likely to creep in. We forget to factor in that we’re overworked, tired or just plain depleted. We lose sight that we’re resilient, and quite capable of coming up for air and regrouping once we’ve regained our footing.
Psychologists call the tendency to zoom in on what we believe to be true confirmation bias (link is external), which becomes a dangerous path if we’re analyzing during peak anxiety moments. Beliefs born out of anxious moments can catapult us into an avalanche of messy cognitive distortions (link is external)and self-sabotage.
Here are four traps to watch out for when you find yourself saturated with stress and anxiety:
Trap # 1: You forget about context. You go on a bender ripping yourself apart without fully accounting for what’s going on around you. It’s natural to be wound up when we’re facing the treacherous conditions commonplace in today’s breakneck world. Most of us are doing the work of multiple people and enduring endless checklists and massive time pressures. Account for what is happening around you. It’s not a moral failing if you find yourself saturated with anxiety. It means you’re working hard and you care.
Trap # 2: You bolt. The quick exit is so tempting when things go awry. Research (link is external)overwhelming affirms that difficulty can build grit and stress resistance. Even though the instinct to give in or escape discomfort may be intensive, it’s wise to try and buy time and reevaluate once the anxiety has subsided. Very often, after a regroup, we identify new solutions and tools that make a huge difference in ability to navigate anxious moments.
Trap # 3: You try and problem solve in the heat of the moment. When we’re clobbered with stress, we want to make immediate sense of things so we can develop an effective plan. Unfortunately, high anxiety levels can lead to unproductive mental gymnastics, and impede our ability to see the big picture. Generally, we problem solve best when we have enough stress and adrenaline to be focused, but not so much that our brains are spiraling into overdrive.
Trap # 4: You keep it a secret. Most of us who have faced anxiety know that we should have come out with it sooner, and that doing so brings about great relief. Letting it fester and go untended is a surefire way to add fuel to the fire. Anxiety is part of our human essence. When we’re out living life, stress finds us. We don’t have to shout our turmoil from a mountaintop, but seeking trusted confidants-whether in the form of a mentor, friend, family member, coach or therapist can bring about tremendous relief. Hidden anxiety can wreak havoc, leaving us wound up, worried, and in a perpetual state of turmoil.
In today’s complex landscape, we all struggle with anxiety in one form or another. Which traps are you most prone to fall into? Are there some that you are generally able to avoid? Your capacity to navigate the slopes of anxiety can be improved by focusing on your capacity to regroup and become more surefooted, and avoiding the trappings of inaccurate self-judgment.